It will take a lot of
    magic, money, a little luck
      and a spin of the wheel
      to save our planet from
          a great new evil
      that is threatening us!

      A WONDERFUL NEW BOOK BY A WONDERFUL NEW AUTHOR!

                Just ask these characters:

"This is insane," whispered Shae-doe to Lou.  "Relatively
insane."

"A quarter?" Kaye-Boom asked, slightly puzzled by the
childish request.  "I don't have a quarter."

"It's better than my day--being abducted by a super-natural
spirit from another world, locked in a cell, then blown up by
a fire wizard... not a fun way to spend a day."  Laurie
Miller frowned at Lou; "My boss will probably fire me for
this..."

      Or ask the main character to tell you about it:

"Why don't you tell them?  You're the author," Lou rebutted.

                 Or even ask The Dead Eye:

"I don't have a neck," The Dead Eye pointed out.

     Very nice, but that's all we have room for.  Bye.